


Lost Nights

by Samunderthelights



Series: The End Of The Night [4]
Category: Vikings (TV)
Genre: Angst, Brother/Brother Incest, Brotherly Love, Brothers, Canon Related, Don't copy to another site, M/M, Sibling Incest, part of a series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-15
Updated: 2020-04-15
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:34:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23663179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Samunderthelights/pseuds/Samunderthelights
Summary: Hi!Here is the 4th part that I wrote, and it's self-explanatory as to when it takes place. Sorry, again no smut. But like I said, I'm still writing for this pairing, and there are still some more stories coming up!Enjoy!Xx
Relationships: Hvitserk & Ubbe (Vikings), Hvitserk/Ubbe (Vikings)
Series: The End Of The Night [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1592800
Comments: 4
Kudos: 23





	Lost Nights

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!  
> Here is the 4th part that I wrote, and it's self-explanatory as to when it takes place. Sorry, again no smut. But like I said, I'm still writing for this pairing, and there are still some more stories coming up!  
> Enjoy!  
> Xx

“I can’t believe it has come to this,” Ubbe admits, when Torvi joins him. He is watching Hvitserk, Bjorn and Lagertha, who are deep in conversation. And although Ubbe knows that his younger brother is only here as a hostage, while Halfdan is a hostage for the other side right now, just seeing Hvitserk again after everything that has happened, makes him feel like he finally has him back again. But he knows he is wrong in feeling any relief, any happiness as he watches him, because Hvitserk is still fighting on Ivar’s side. He hasn’t changed his mind, and he has not come back.

  
“It is normal to be happy to see him again,” Torvi says, but Ubbe can’t bring himself to look up at her, because he knows that she would see right through him. “He is still your brother, Ubbe.”

  
“Is he?”

  
“He is not like Ivar.”

  
“He chose to stay with him,” Ubbe says, his eyes still focussed on his brother. “He knew what he was like, and still he chose…”

  
“Then talk to him, perhaps you can make him change his mind,” Torvi suggests. “Tell him how much you miss him.”

  
“He made his choice.”

  
“He can make a choice again. He can choose to stay with us.”

  
Ubbe knows that she is right, but he can see that something has changed in his brother. He can see that he has become not necessarily stronger, but tougher, colder, that he has built a wall around himself. But Ubbe can’t figure out if he is trying to keep something in, or if he is trying to keep something out. Perhaps even both.

  
“Are you scared?” Torvi asks, and Ubbe finally takes his eyes off his brother, and looks at her. “Just talk to him, Ubbe.”

  
“And if he still goes back to Ivar?”

  
“Then at least you’ll have tried.”

  
Torvi gets up, and she walks off, and although Ubbe knows that he should go over to his brothers and Lagertha, hear what they are discussing, he can’t get himself to get up. He just can’t do it. Not yet.

* * *

Everyone has gone to bed hours ago, and Ubbe knows he should try and get some sleep, rest before tomorrow. But there is a gnawing feeling in the pit of his stomach that tells him that tomorrow’s negotiations will not go as planned, that there will be no peace. He knows that this means that he will have to fight his brothers, and no matter how many times he has tried telling himself that it’s what needs to be done, it just doesn’t feel right. They are family, and they should be working together, they should not be working against each other.

  
“May I?”

  
Ubbe recognises his brother’s voice, and he can’t help but smile, even after everything, as his brother sits down with him.  
But even in the dark he can see the pained look on his brother’s face. Only hours ago, there had been a wall put up around him, but it’s gone now, and he looks tired. He looks like the lost boy Ubbe had once known so well, and no matter what has happened, it still hurts Ubbe to see that his brother is upset.

  
“Why did you stay with him?” he asks, but his brother just looks away. “Look at what he has done to you.”

  
“He hasn’t done anything to me,” Hvitserk tries, but Ubbe can see that he is trying to convince himself, more than anything. “You know why I couldn’t go with you.”

  
“What? Because he knew we…”

  
“He threatened to tell everyone.”

  
“So?” Ubbe asks. “We have done nothing wrong. You should have come with me, Hvitserk. Choosing to stay with him…”

  
“I’m sorry,” Hvitserk mumbles, still avoiding his brother’s eyes.

  
“Are you?”

  
“Yes,” Hvitserk admits. “I think so.”

  
“You think so?” Ubbe asks, in a mocking manner, and his brother finally looks at him. “Do you actually want to fight on Ivar’s side? You know what he is like, don’t you?”

  
“I don’t know if I made the right decision that day,” Hvitserk admits. “But I am sorry for hurting you. I know you…”

  
“Don’t.”

  
Hvitserk nods, and Ubbe can see the shame written all over his face, but he can feel the anger, the hurt from that day coming back to him, and he doesn’t want to let himself go back there.

  
“I don’t want to fight you, Ubbe. I don’t want to have to kill you.”

  
“Then stay,” Ubbe says, but he can see that his brother is still that confused, lost boy. “Please.”

  
“I can’t. I have to go back.”

  
“Why? Are you scared of Ivar? Is that it?”

  
“We have to kill Lagertha,” Hvitserk says, and Ubbe nods, knowing that this is just another excuse he is telling himself. “She killed our mother.”

  
“And Ivar killed our brother.” Ubbe spits out. “Or have you already forgotten about what he did to Sigurd?”

  
“Of course not.”

  
“What makes you think he won’t do the same to you, huh?” Ubbe asks, “What makes you think he won’t kill you if you disagree with him? If you speak up against him?”

  
“I’m his brother, he won’t…”

  
“He killed our brother!”

  
“I know, but he didn’t mean to.”

  
“What makes you think he won’t betray you?” Ubbe asks, but Hvitserk just shrugs. “You betrayed me, so…”

  
“I know.”

  
A long silence follows, until Hvitserk is about to get up. Ubbe knows he might not get a chance to speak to him again, maybe not ever. So he grabs his arm, not willing to let him leave yet.

  
“I love you, Hvitserk,” he says, and he can see that he words get to his brother, that they send a shiver right through his body. “I miss you.”

  
“How is Margrethe?”

  
Ubbe knows that he is changing the subject, to avoid having to discuss what had happened back in England. But Hvitserk is sitting back down, and Ubbe is just glad to not have to say goodbye to him just yet, so he will let him change the subject to just about anything, if it means he gets to have him by his side just a little longer.

  
“Margrethe is…”

  
“She’s not dead, is she?”

  
“No! But she is not the same anymore,” Ubbe admits. “She has become… angry.”

  
“Because of me?” Hvitserk asks. “Does she hate me?”

  
“She hates almost everyone nowadays.”

  
“What happened?”

  
“I’m not sure,” Ubbe admits. “But she is not the girl I fell in love with. That you fell in love with.”

  
“I’m sorry,” Hvitserk says, but then he stifles a yawn, and Ubbe can’t help but smile.

  
“You should try and get some sleep.”

  
Hvitserk nods, but he doesn’t get up. Instead, he hesitates, before putting a hand on his brother’s knee.

  
“I miss you too.”

  
“Then stay, Hvitserk,” Ubbe whispers, as he leans his forehead against the side of his brother’s head. “Please.”

  
Hvitserk turns his head, and he presses his lips against Ubbe’s, and although the kiss lights a fire in Ubbe which he hasn’t felt for a long time, he knows what this kiss means. This is an apology, a goodbye, and when Hvitserk’s lips leave his, he feels a cold washing over him.

  
“Please, Hvitserk.”

  
“I’m sorry.”

* * *

Ubbe had known that the negotiations would lead to nothing, but Ivar had tricked them once again, and once again he had made a mockery of all of them again. But right now he can’t even get himself to get wound up about it, because there is a sick feeling in his stomach, ever since he had watched Hvitserk leave with Ivar. Somewhere deep inside there had still been a little bit of hope that he would change his mind, but it had been crushed, and he knows what this means.

  
“Hvitserk?” Torvi asks, and Ubbe looks up at her.

  
“I can’t fight him, Torvi.”

  
“Did you talk to him?”

  
“I did.”

  
“And he still went back?” Torvi asks. “Doesn’t he know…”

  
“He knows,” Ubbe says, but then he takes a deep breath, trying to calm the sick feeling in his stomach. “But he chose to go back to Ivar.”

  
“Then you have no choice. If it comes to it, you will have to fight him.”

  
“He’s my brother.”

  
“So what, you are just going to let him kill you?” Torvi asks. “He made his choice, Ubbe.”

  
“I will not kill my brother, Torvi. I can’t.”


End file.
